Wish Upon a Star

This outfit reminds me of the ’90s Disney Channel movie Wish Upon a Star, where Katherine Heigl switches bodies with her sister. It’s so good. I loved that movie as a kid and wanted to grow up to look just like her and now I totally do! Just shorter and with a different face. 


Crushed velvet dress, choker, and jelly shoes: Forever 21 



I’m in Kansas for a week watching my dad’s house and taking care of their animals. I made a vlog about my trip here and introduced all the animals by recreating the opening of Bring it On. I don’t know I guess I’m just a creative genius??

I sure do hope Jared Kushner goes to prison. 

Come find me on social media and say hi! @erikaheidewald 

Thoughts in the Flowers

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Shirt and shorts: Forever 21

(The shoes are black and white platform sandals also from Forever 21 but I didn’t get a picture of them)

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I love this outfit! It’s Frida’s shirt and this was my first time wearing it. I felt like a cast member of Grease.

It feels a little weird to write a fashion post on a day like this where there was a terrible terrorist attack, but I do think paying a lot of attention to these attacks makes them continue. I wrote about that in a thread on Twitter:

I don’t judge people for having genuine human reactions and putting those reactions online. Writing online is obviously one way that I deal with my feelings, too. But terrorism works because of the terror it causes. That widespread terror leads terrorists to commit more awful crimes, because they know it works. If we were to simply ignore these attacks, though, what kind of people would that make us? What message would that send to their loved ones?

At the same time, England is an incredibly safe country. So is the US. Crime is down and terrorism is incredibly rare statistically. We’re still more likely to die from slipping and falling in the bathtub than getting murdered by a terrorist. Every time we stop everything to focus on a terror attack, we make terrorism seem like a more common and widespread issue than it really is, and that’s a dangerous place to be in our modern world. We don’t want people scared, angry, and looking for someone to blame.

I feel very sad for everyone who lost their lives tonight. I feel sad that angry, lonely people choose to inflict needless pain and suffering in the world. Life doesn’t have to be like this.

Sending all of you my love.

 

Wearing florals to a Wonder Woman event at the YouTube space!

I have been serving some major looks lately but haven’t written a blog post because I am a bad person?? but mostly very busy. I had a lot of fun in the outfit I wore to this Wonder Woman master class at the YouTube space on Friday.

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Dress and kimono robe: Forever 21

Shoes: Target

The dress and kimono are both Frida’s and her review of the outfit was that she would not have been brave enough to wear them together but she liked it. I hadn’t really considered that maybe they didn’t go together because I love the two florals combined! The kimono also makes this super-short dress a lot less intimidating to wear.

Wonder Woman is going to be amazing. We already bought tickets for opening weekend and we NEVER see movies in the theater. I made a vlog of the event if you want to check it out:

CADEM – the California Democratic convention – was yesterday. I ran for a delegate slot in January and lost and after seeing videos online, I’m glad I lost. It looked horrible. You have a bunch of people who are new to the party/not really members of the party protesting the entire time, shouting down speakers, and some of the organizers getting heated in return. It’s ridiculous to protest a group of California Democrats with signs about single payer. Almost every California Democrat wants single payer. That’s like going to Peta and screaming at them that they should become vegetarian. People seem hopped up on anger and self-righteousness and I don’t see how anything productive can come out of that. The California Democratic Party is a success. Our state is a success. It doesn’t need to be destroyed. I feel incredibly grateful to live in a state where the Democratic Party is in power and ensuring my rights and freedoms.

Come find me on social media and say hi, I’m there all the time! Especially on instastory 🙂

 

New Horizons 5.6.17

Shirt: H&M

Jeans and purse: Target

Jacket: NASA (bought it at Cape Canaveral) 

Shoes: Converse
I got these jeans a couple days ago at Target and it’s incredible what a well-fitting pair of jeans can do for your psyche. I’m a new woman. 

I’ve been on a journey to learn how to roll a joint for a movie I’m shooting next week. I don’t smoke weed because it makes me tired and boring but I booked a role as a small time drug dealer and I need to roll joints on camera. I made a vlog about my journey of self-discovery: 

I posted about this on twitter and it was interesting to see the responses. I’ve noticed that people on Twitter often don’t get when I’m joking around or being lighthearted. I guess most people followed me because of my political opinions so they expect me to be serious all the time, but I’m not. I can’t be. I can’t ever choose between being a serious person with educated political opinions and being a silly person who makes profanity-laced jokes. So yeah, my journey to learn how to roll a joint is supposed to be humorous. I’m making fun of myself for being completely clueless. I find it fascinating how many people assume I’m always being serious. Hyperbole is my natural state. 


I find taking a serious photo pretending to smoke a poorly-made prop joint hilarious, and it doesn’t hurt that I look good, too. 

I feel like people like being able to categorize you. Everyone wants to fit you in a box so they can make sense of you. It’s fascinating seeing people on Twitter describe my political opinions and try and ascribe labels to me so they can feel satisfied that I have been defined. I’m not even defiantly opposed to labels, but it’s unreasonable to expect people to conform to them all the time. I can be a Democrat who doesn’t always agree with everything Democrats do. I can be smart and obsessed with makeup at the same time. I can use my social media to talk about fascism and make jokes about how you should just let opossums in your house so they can become your pets. (I tweeted this today and someone said, “Really??” Like girl…. what do you think?)

I hope you’re all having a blessed weekend. For the record, I say “blessed” because I find it funny. Sigh.

Say hi on social media, I’m there a lot @erikaheidewald 

Indiana to LA ✈️

I’m back in LA! I had one last nice morning in Indiana with my mom and then got in an aluminum tube shooting across the sky as I watched Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. 


Jacket: Forever 21

Shoes: Mossimo at Target

Purse and backpack: Target

Dress: Tahari

New shoes!! I got them today at Target. I like Target a little bit, in case you didn’t notice. I had to dress up because I’m flying standby on pass travel – my aunt is a flight attendant and I am her official plus one – and since you’re representing the company, you have to dress up. Wearing a dress and heels in the airport still feels pretty ridiculous to me but I enjoy it, too. Everyone stares at you when you’re dressed up at the airport. I like attention. 


My new choker is from Claire’s!

I read up on the healthcare news right before I got on the plane and it’s just horribly depressing. I won’t have the money to buy health insurance without the ACA and I know health insurance is predicated on young, healthy people like me buying it. The system needs me to function, but I won’t be able to afford it. Frida currently doesn’t have health insurance and I have nightmares about her getting appendicitis like my brother did last year. I really wish the media would stop reporting on politics like a horse race. It isn’t about one party winning and another losing. Even if Republicans get voted out in 2018 over this, people will still have lost their lives. The AHCA will kill people. 

I’m really glad to be back in LA with Frida, even though it’s just for a few days! I go to Montana on Tuesday to film the movie Big Fork, then I’ll be back in LA Thursday night. Good thing I actually love flying. 

Sending my love to everyone in danger of losing their healthcare or who is feeling despondent. 

Find me on social media everywhere @erikaheidewald and say hi. 

Otis Days 5.3.17

I’ve spent the last few days in my hometown of Bloomington, Indiana visiting my mom and my former foster dog, Otis.

I’ve gotten really into editing my photos. Don’t worry about it. 

Pretty proud of this one tbh. 

Our amazing day at the lake!!! 

I was not supposed to let him on the couch and I mostly didn’t but when I came in the room and he was already on it, I took some cute pics before making him get off. Making cozy dogs get off of couches feels cruel to me. 
I’ve had no time for outfit posts (also I pack super light when I travel and then look bad the whole time I’m on vacation) or thinking about politics, except for the random rant on Twitter. It sucks sometimes to be enjoying my life and then I check twitter and it’s just a cesspool of negativity. Which makes sense – our political situation sucks right now, and I’m negative on twitter a lot too – but it’s draining. It’s nicer to spend time with a cute dog.
I have been wanting to vlog more so I made a pretty cute vlog of my two days with Otis! Check it out and subscribe to my channel to keep up to date. 😘

Follow me on social media I’m on my phone so much.

There’s Nowhere Like Home 4.27.17

I’m in Kansas for a long weekend, babysitting my brothers and sisters! I have six brothers and sisters, five of whom live with my dad, and I’m helping out so my parents can go out of town for a couple days.

IMG_6499IMG_6492Hoodie: American Eagle (got it in high school, it’s an old fave)

Hat and choker: Forever 21

Jacket: Northface (it does not match. I was just cold)

Jeans: Frida’s from SwedenIMG_6464

My little sister is 5 and she’s already cooler than me. Not fair. My dad was only willing to take one photo of us together and her eyes are closed so that’s just how it is. My brother and I tried to take photos together but Duchess kept getting in the way. 🙂

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Murphy is one of the most beautiful dogs on the planet, both inside and out. I am obsessed.

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I flew to Kansas early Wednesday morning and had a real FASHION EMERGENCY. I had to dress up because I was flying standby as a guest (my aunt is a flight attendant and I’m her official guest), which means you have to look nice. I don’t own too many nice outfits so I wore a gorgeous black dress and one of the only pairs of heels I have. I bought them in college and haven’t worn them in a while and holy shit.

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THEY BROKE. This is a photo of just one but the other one broke a minute later. While I was standing in the security line, with no way to stop moving forward or change my shoes. Don’t make my mistakes – if you haven’t worn a pair of heels in a while, don’t wear them for a big event like a night out or trying to fly standby on an airplane. The glue might have died completely. This moment truly sucked, and then I had to wear tennis shoes with a nice black dress. Thank God I made it on the plane anyway!

 

I watched Girlboss on the plane and let me tell you… I am feeling flare jeans again. These have been teasing a comeback for a while and I think it can really happen.IMG_6450

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This is Eva. She’s just really cute.

I haven’t been able to be on the internet keeping up with politics too much for the last couple days since I was traveling to Kansas and then hanging out with my family, but I did have a tweet thread blow up and gained 1,000 followers in a day which is always sort of a strange experience when I don’t have the time to keep up with what’s going on. It’s also hard not to focus on the tiny percentage of people who misinterpret my meaning completely and get all pissy for no reason. I know the vast majority of people who read the tweet don’t react like that, so I shouldn’t focus on it, but it’s frustrating to be misunderstood. I wrote that Ivanka Trump has a White House job and some people took that to mean I think she’s an impressive person. I don’t – she shouldn’t have a White House job – but the fact is that she does, and that means she should be held accountable as part of the administration, not defended as a child.

A lot of people have been criticizing Obama’s $400,000 speaking fee to a bank and I just can’t with this shit. Obama wants to make some dynastic wealth for his family, that’s his business. There’s very little of that for Black families in America. Get Sasha and Malia a trust fund. Take them kitesurfing. I don’t care, it’s his money. I also don’t think there’s anything inherently evil about speaking to a bank. I just don’t. More than anything, I’m fucking exhausted at the double standard. It feels more obvious than ever that Hillary and Obama are always held to a different, much higher standard than any white male politician. And the glee with which people tear them apart is appalling, especially when it comes from the left. There are a lot of white leftists who claim to want Democrats to win elections, yet seem completely uninterested in the needs and preferences of Black voters, who are the Democratic Party’s base. Shitting on Barack Obama is not the way to win Black voters. A lot of white leftists seem to think it’s OK to take the Black vote for granted while in pursuit of the fleeing white man vote and it’s not. It’s politically wrong and morally wrong. If the Democratic Party abandons Black voters in order to win back racist whites, we will lose and we will deserve to.

If you want to see a lot more cute pics of my siblings and my dogs, you can find me on social media @erikaheidewald!

 

Disneyland Magic 4.24.17

I had a ridiculously great weekend, the kind of weekend that if I even tell you about it, you’ll hate me out of jealousy. OK, I tell you about it anyway. On Saturday I woke up first thing to an email telling me I booked a feature shooting in Montana in May. I really wanted to get this job and all I want to do with my life is travel and act in movies so this was a really great way to start the weekend. Then Frida and I drove up to the Antelope Valley Poppy Reserve to see the superbloom, but you’ll have to see those pictures later as we took a million and haven’t had time to go through them yet.

Yesterday we went with our friend Suzee to Disneyland! We have annual passes and we go at least once a month. I think having a place where you go and you always have fun and you can’t do any work is honestly invaluable.

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Velvet bodysuit: Forever 21

Shorts: H&M

Shoes: Keds

Hello Kitty socks: Target

I do think it’s time to retire these shorts after this trip. I felt a little ridiculous in them since they’re so big now. But what a swell bon voyage trip this was for them!

We do Disney in a very chill way – go on a few rides, eat once or twice, walk around and enjoy the ambience, then go home after five or six hours. It’s heavenly. After I got home I had to work on my Smosh articles so I didn’t have much time to keep up with the news. I am relieved to see that at this point it looks like Le Pen will not win the runoff election in France. France’s election is another big bellwether to see how strong the anti-democratic trend is in the West. Will America be one of the first big dominos to fall, or will other countries learn from our mistake? At least by looking at the Dutch and French elections, it appears so far that Europe may be deciding that they don’t want their own Donald Trumps, after all. Of course no (democratic) election is a sure thing, and I hope the French get out and vote for Macron in droves in the runoff.

I’m feeling a little exhausted with the political internet sphere at the moment. Men are hatefully obsessing over Chelsea Clinton, who isn’t doing a damn thing besides express her opinions, on a daily basis. I’m sick of people getting up in arms every time I make a joke on Twitter. I have a sense of humor and sometimes I use it. I never swore an oath to be serious all the time. I’m sick of Bernie Sanders shitting on the Democratic Party every chance he gets and when Democrats express frustration, we’re told *we* are the ones being divisive. Sometimes I feel like Twitter is a different world that does not reflect the real one and we waste a lot of time thinking that the opinions expressed on there have any application in the real world. I’ll have news stories blowing up my timeline to the point where I assume it must be major news everywhere, and then I can’t find a mention of it in any real news sources. A perfect example of this Twitter/real world dichotomy is the liberal/progressive divide. Some people on Twitter have decided that these are very different things. They call themselves progressives and decide who else is allowed to be called progressive, and anyone to the left of the Republican Party who they hate is deemed a liberal. This distinction does not exist in the real world. The New York Times and the Washington Post regularly refer to the Bernie Sanders/Keith Ellison wing as the “liberal” wing of the Democratic Party, which means “liberal” does not at all mean to the New York Times what it means to Twitter. It starts to feel like we have invented a fake world just to fight with each other in it. And I was never a World of Warcraft kind of girl.

Feel free to tweet nice things at my any time, or follow me on Instagram @erikaheidewald!

 

Friyay 4.21.17

Today was one of those days where I didn’t put my makeup on until 4pm. The life of a freelancer who works from home!

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Tanktop, shorts, and choker: Forever 21

Yep, another all-Forever 21 outfit! At this point that’s going to be the title of my memoir. I look miserable but I’m not, that’s just my face. I am so incredibly grateful that half-up, half-down hairstyles are in right now, as that’s one of the only hairstyles easy to pull off on curly hair. I’m already dreading the day when half-up half-down hairstyles, chokers, and shirts tied around the waist go out of style.

Today I woke up, edited, and posted our new video, one of those things that I really wonder why I put it on the internet. Why don’t I seem to have any sense of privacy? I admire intensely private celebrities. No idea what that’s like.

Maybe someday I’ll regret posting all my private thoughts and experiences online but… probably not. I’ve never been a private person, even before social media wasn’t the huge presence it is now. I don’t want people to bother my family members or show up where I live (or threaten my life or other obviously terrible things), but in general I don’t mind if strangers know a lot about me.

People who follow me on Twitter or Instagram probably remember my foster dog Otis – Frida and I rescued him from a neighbor who was neglecting him and took care of him for two months until I drove him from Los Angeles to Indiana where he is now living with my friend Katie who I’ve known since middle school. Katie and my mom live in the same town so my mom is now Otis’ #1 dogsitter and watches him a couple times a week while Katie is at work. She sent me these pictures of Otis today and it turns out he’s learned how to drive!

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I miss him so much it’s ridiculous, and I live for pictures of him even though they all make me cry. I wish I’d been able to keep him but I know Katie is the best dog mom Otis could wish for.

I wrote an article for Global Comment about resistance fatigue today, I’ll share a link once it’s posted. I talked about the importance of self-care, but not letting self-care become a justification to not do anything. We’re only three months in, this is still the beginning. Processed with VSCO with c1 preset

We won’t be at the science march tomorrow because we’re going to the Antelope Valley Poppy Reserve to see the superbloom, enjoy God’s majesty (I don’t actually believe in God, but I enjoy this phrase) and take some sick-ass Instagram pics.

Thanks to everyone who is reading this brand-new blog, I’m excited you’re here!

Find me on social media always @erikaheidewald

Burnt Orange – 4.20.17

I love this (faux) suede skirt so I’m trying to wear it while I still can – it’s a couple sizes too big and will soon start to look ridiculous. There aren’t a lot of downsides to losing some weight, but not having your clothes fit is one.

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Tanktop, skirt, choker, and jelly shoes: Forever 21. I am a basic bitch omg

I feel slightly embarrassed when I realize I’m wearing an all-Forever-21 outfit but shit, I am very poor and their clothes are adorable. I really look forward to the day when I can afford to buy organic cotton/hand-sewn/eco-friendly/human-friendly clothes but today is not that day.

I also felt a little ridiculous when I first put my hair up in this half bun because it is SO BIG but hey, it just is. Some of us have huge hair. This is one of the few hairstyles I can actually do with my texture and by myself. Most hairstyle videos are basically worthless for someone with long, curly hair and I don’t like to heat style because I already bleach the fuck out of my hair. I cannot have it fall out. I don’t have the face shape to pull off bald.

Processed with VSCO with c1 presetFrida and I didn’t have anyone to take our picture so we put my camera on a stranger’s car and sat on the sidewalk. FASHION BLOGGERS GET IT DONE. This is far from the first time I’ve sat on the sidewalk in Hollywood and every time I do it people tell me how gross it is. I live in Hollywood. Gross is my element.

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This is one of my 10,000 daily Instagram story posts. In our house, Frida does a lot of the domestic work. She cleans, she cooks, she does the laundry. But I’m the tall one. I do all the driving, and I’m tall. So I screwed a hook into the ceiling and hung this canopy, as well as fairy lights around the perimeter of our room, and I’m feeling pretty good about my contribution to the house.

I spent a couple hours researching nuclear war today for a new Rose Resistance PSA we’re working on. A lot of my plans for the future are contingent on Jim Jong Un not nuking Los Angeles, even though he will probably have that capability within the next few years.

Today was, of course, 4/20. I wrote this:

and wow, so many racist potheads came into my mentions to make it known to me just how racist they are. There is a certain type of guy who may have a MAGA or DSA political affiliation, I honestly can’t tell which one, they really love weed, definitely hate women, and seem to view all of life as a big fucking joke. I miss the time in my life several years ago when I barely knew they existed. The Democratic Party should make absolutely no concessions to bring these people on board. I was going to say “these voters” but honestly most of them probably don’t even vote.

I was saddened to hear about the Supreme Court denying a stay of execution for Ledell Lee so he could pursue DNA testing to try and prove his innocence. The death penalty is a shame on this country. I remember a few days before the November election, talking about it with Frida. California voters had an opportunity to end the death penalty in our state and I was desperate for us to take it. I’d made a video, written about it, tried to get the word out to the extent of my ability. And I just burst into sobs because it breaks my heart that my country does something so evil. Evil isn’t a word I like to use much, but I do believe that the state killing people solely for the purpose of retribution is evil. California voters did not vote to end the death penalty – in fact, they voted to speed it up, which only increases the likelihood that there will be innocent people put to death – a crushing November 8th disappointment to add to all the others.

When Frida got home from her meeting this evening, we shot a video for our YouTube channel (on our new pink set!) where we took a sex personality quiz. And that’s just life now. Really tragic things mixed with trivial, silly things. Days where I focus on nuclear war and my Instagram color scheme. That’s 2017.

Thanks for reading. Find me on social media everywhere, all the time @erikaheidewald